Thursday, April 12, 2012

Did that just REALLY happen?

Did that really just happen? It feels like a bad dream. To wake up knowing that someone would do that to me is something I never thought I would have to do. By definition a Sociopath is a person with a psychopathic personality whose behavior is antisocial often criminal, and who lacks a sense of moral responsibility or social conscience. I never would have imagined I was dating a sociopath for EIGHT years. I always knew there was something wrong with the guy but I never thought he was that sick. Its a shock that I hope many people out there will never have to deal with. 
I met this guy through a mutual friend years ago. She had warned me to stay away and of course I pursued him. It was like telling a child not to do something knowing that they would do the thing you told them not to. I remember the first time I met this guy. There was an instant attraction. I went to an outdoor concert with the fellow and spent the entire night with him. I was invited by this mutual friend who ended up ditching us. I knew from the first time I met him that he was a bad boy. I have always gone for the bad boys. I realize now how childish it was. 
I began a cyber relationship with him. We would talk on AOL instant messenger EVERYDAY. It was the only time I got to talk to him. I always wondered why. But I would convince myself that he was busy etc... I never thought it was a means for him to be someone else. I told this person intimate details about my life, my family my friends etc. and to think I was talking to a person that didn't exist doesn't make sense to me. I met this guy in 2004. I was young and single. I just just come out of a four year relationship and was not looking of anything serious. I wanted to have fun. I wanted to meet people. I started sleeping with him. It was just fun. It was just physical. I remember there were times I didn't even kiss him. It was the fist time I had done